World of fantasy

Sitting in the corner of the bed, shutting off yourself from the world listening to music and looking outside. feeling empty like all I have is myself alone keeping myself busy with music and lost in all thoughts. Asking myself did I do anything wrong in my previous life that I'm being alone like this. People see me smile and laugh but they don't see that I'm half broken inside. Being surrounded by people only make you feel like being alone is better just yourself and your imagination. sitting in a crowded place only make me feel like an outcast. The feeling inside telling me you don't belong here run away from them. but I kept ignoring it. Telling myself it's ok it's only for a while endure it, it's going to be alright. I smile as if I feel nothing is wrong with me. But not sure for how long, every step I take makes me think twice and guilty. I once asked myself am I doing the right thing. No reply came it's ok it's ok don't have to worry about

Did you ever know after being alone just by yourself and then looking at other couples thinking about your own self that will I ever find someone. Then suddenly an unexpected turn occurred took you off your feet and changed the way you think,more like stirring himself into my life with everything that he does. People say age does not matter! Well I guess at some point it's true crazy but true. A long distance relationship makes a person look like they are closer well actually close one doesn't last longer but some say having a long distance makes two people close to eachother. whatever you do just can't stop wondering about him. Early morning greetings and good night message just makes your day. Sharing things like pictures of places you've been or getting mad because he refuses to take meds but emotional blackmail makes it work. Taking care from so far away feels like a fairy tail adventure. It's like a dream of never ending happiness but what makes me sad is when